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Dave, 24, was totally psyched when a woman he was seeing asked to get a little wild."An ex-girlfriend lay down on the bed and begged me to rip off her clothes, which I did.Honestly this is basically just investing in your future orgasms.While he might like he knows exactly what's up, no one ever wished for *less* direction in bed.

This makes it more comfortable for him to talk about his own fantasies, and will establish a baseline trust and safe space.

But when [we had sex] for the first time, she was wild. Kristie Overstreet Ph D suggests telling your partner that he can’t talk, touch, or even move unless he’s told to.

Before I could even try to take off her clothes, she threw me back on the bed and blindfolded me with her bra," he remembers. I didn't lift a finger."For a softer approach, Brame suggests positions like reverse cowgirl, which prevent him from controlling the rhythm. Tell him if he disobeys you or doesn’t follow your directions, he’ll be punished.

The sex was great, but letting me tear her shirt in half was the best part because it was passionate and intense."Which, okay, fine. For every wild, aggressive bone-sesh you’ve had, your partner would probably welcome a break sometimes, too.

Brian, 26 says: "I was dating a woman who was sort of a bookworm.

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